Think about those times in your life when you have felt inspired to something really great. Where does that inspiration come from?
The Holy Spirit. God inspires us to do great things with our lives.
----Matthew Kelly

Welcome to The Not So Perfect Catholic!

Disclaimer: I am not a theologian, just a Catholic empty-nester trying to figure it all out. The views on this blog are my own.
Showing posts with label classroom of silence. Show all posts
Showing posts with label classroom of silence. Show all posts

Time: What a Gift!

Photo by Pixabay: https://www.pexels.com/photo/red-2-bell-alarm-clock-on-grass-field-36351/
I recently went through the Called and Gifted Discernment Process (St. Catherine of Siena Institute). This made me aware of the gifts He has given to me that I bring to Him at every Mass I participate in. That just seemed like "old news" to me. I feel that He wants something more, but what? 

As if right on cue, Dynamic Catholic's Daily Reflection for January 7, 2025, corresponded with the meditation in Fr. Mark Toup's book:

As Fr. Mark says: "We need time for Sabbath. We need time for rest. We need time for silence, reflection, and prayer." He goes on to refer to Pope Benedict XVI: Making time for God is a "fundamental element for spiritual growth....he will enable us to understand more deeply what he expects of me." 

I hate to sound like a broken record, but in thinking back over the past few years, God was gracious and merciful enough to gift Robert & me with time. Now it is my time to give Him the gift of my time. And as Matthew Kelly put it in his reflection, it seems like a simple thing but it won't be easy. Sometimes, when I come home after Daily Mass, an appointment, or an outing, I just want to stay home for the rest of the day. Especially in the winter when it's cold and the wind is blowing, I just want to stay home. I like being in my little prayer corner, but there are so many distractions. Sitting in front of the Tabernacle, whether the Blessed Sacrament is exposed or not, gives me clarity and helps me focus on HIM. 

I'm finding that Anna the prophetess is currently a kindred spirit. While I'm not going to live in the church, I have set myself up to spend a lot of time there through Adoration. Could it really be that simple? That He only wants my time? I'm at a point in my life when I am able to give Him the time He is asking for. I've said many times that if people only knew the graces received by spending an hour with Jesus in Adoration, the chapels would be overflowing. There were times in my life when I felt stretched to give Him that much, and I'm sure He understood. But now is the time. Now is the time to spend time with Him, to get to know Him, and to understand His plan for me. 

Words from Lent

As I reflected on Lent, several key words popped out several times throughout my Blessed is She On the Way Journal. These words/phrases helped define my Lenten Journey and helped me have the best Lent of my life so far.
Do not let my heart be drawn into worshipping other gods. (Deuteronomy 30:17) I defined the gods in my life as social media, as well as my profession (Speech Language Pathology). My goal for Lent was to cut back on social media; not cut it out completely, but reduce the use and use it to profess my faith. Even though I’m in the last phase of my career, I had been spending an awful lot of time on my professional blog, as well as making materials to sell on a teacher website. It was definitely an “out” after my mother’s passing (July, 2014), so it was time to put that aside and delve into reality. I drastically cut back on those things; I closed my laptop and addressed things in the house that needed to be addressed. When my laptop was open, it was used mostly for devotions or checking out Catholic-related sites.

Forgiveness. I was forgiven by a former coworker who acknowledged a letter I sent to her; she accepted my apology and expressed forgiveness. Will we ever be best friends? No, but I think hope that we both will be there for each other should we ever be in that situation.

Free Will. God gives us everything, but we have to decide to take it. We have no control over what someone else is doing; all we can do is pray and ask God to lead him back on the right path. I’m a bit of a control freak, so this is something I have a very hard time with. Around my calendar I have the phrases, Jesus I trust in You, as well as Lord, I give this to you. And I have prayed those prayers every single day since I wrote them around my calendar.

Humility. This word resounded all throughout Lent, and culminated by the washing of feet on Holy Thursday. I felt the humility of the people having their feet washed by the priest, as well as the humility of the priest.

God has a plan. WOW. Just how awesome this is hit home for me while we were at the beach for Spring Break. My husband & I walked onto the beach, looked up, and were amazed at the stars. It makes you realize just how small we are, but for each one of us, He has a plan. We just have to pray that he shows that plan to us, and that we have the awareness and the courage to follow that plan.

Fear. Fear of peer pressure, fear of not knowing the right words to say if I’m confronted about my faith, fear of being persecuted for my beliefs. A couple of weeks ago, we read about Susanna who was falsely accused but faced her fear and put it in God’s hands, and Daniel who faced the fear of being ridiculed for standing up for her. I pray for their courage during those moments when I’m afraid.

Silence. Having come from a family with 9 siblings, there was rarely a moment of silence in our house when I was growing up. Silence is a very difficult thing for me. I have to have some kind of noise in the background during my day. This Lent, I tried going to sleep without the tv being on. The only time I had it on was when my husband was out of town, so I think I did okay with this. I rarely had the tv on during Lent, saving my tv time for certain shows. (My husband would question the quality of one of the shows I watch, but that’s beside the point!)

I learned so much this Lent. As far as God’s plan for me, I’m still trying to listen and do His will. I’m still trying to listen to His word and live every day as He would have me. I’m no theologian; in fact, I think my Catholic education was greatly lacking. I have a lot on which to catch up.


Did you have the same words speaking to you during Lent? How different were the words you heard?

2nd Sunday of Lent: The Transfiguration

In my post on Friday, I mentioned that I think I have “prayer-life bipolarism”.  One day, I will be flying high, then the next day I seem to hit rock bottom. Why can’t we experience that high every day?
Today in the Gospel, we read about the Transfiguration. One of the deacons gave the Homily, and what he said made perfect sense with helping me understand the “up one day, down the next” thing. In speaking about the Transfiguration, he said that it is believed to have happened 40 days before Good Friday. So…why then? It was so the disciples would have some encouragement; something to cling to because the bad times were coming. He went on to say that there are times we know Jesus is there and we can feel him. (Those would be my “up” days.) That carries us through those times when things are tough.
AHA! The timing of the Transfiguration couldn’t have been better for me! There are no coincidences. I heard (and understood) what I needed at the perfect time. Maybe that’s why the Transfiguration happened when it did: It was the perfect time to prepare the disciples for the rough times. It was what they needed to experience so they had something to cling to during the bad times that were to come, so they wouldn't turn away.
In one of the daily reflections that I’ve been reading daily, there was mention that, just as in the disciples during the Transfiguration, we are partly in heaven and partly on earth during Mass. “Our feet stand on earth, but the Lord comes down from heaven in the Eucharist.” (OneBread, One Body; Winter into Lent edition) How blessed are we that, as Catholics, we have so many opportunities to experience that?
Another part of the Gospel struck me: Then from the cloud came a voice that said, 'This is my chosen Son; listen to Him.'  (Luke 9:35) Remember a few weeks ago when the Gospel was about the wedding at Cana? What did Mary tell the servants? (Hint: Do whatever He tells you. John 2:5) This week during The Best Lent Ever (Dynamic Catholic),  we are urged to spend time with Jesus in the classroom of silence. (I've been seeing this all over the place, not just at Dynamic Catholic.) This is a lot harder than it sounds, especially since I'm the kind of person who likes some kind of noise in the background. (I think that comes from growing up with 9 siblings!) Even so, this is what it's going to take to listen to him so that I can do what He tells me.

Did you have an “aha” moment during your service this weekend?