Think about those times in your life when you have felt inspired to something really great. Where does that inspiration come from?
The Holy Spirit. God inspires us to do great things with our lives.
----Matthew Kelly

Welcome to The Not So Perfect Catholic!

Disclaimer: I am not a theologian, just a Catholic empty-nester trying to figure it all out. The views on this blog are my own.

Someone in the Passage Who is Often Ignored

The words "who is he?" is above a picture of small loaves of bread in a basket.
Photo by Markus Spiske from Pexels
John 6:1-15 has to be a very important Gospel; a lesson that Jesus wants us to learn. My priest mentioned that this passage is in the Bible 6 times. SIX.TIMES. Not only that, but it is in all four of the Gospels. Everyone seems to focus on the miracle that Jesus performed but there is someone in the passage who is often ignored, or not given a lot of time. The boy. 

6 Places in the Gospels

Who is this boy? Where did he come from? Matthew 15:32-39 doesn't mention him in his relaying of the miracle. In fact, Matthew says the people were with Jesus for 3 days, there were 4000 people instead of 5000 (but what's another 1000 to our Lord?), and there were 7 loaves and 2 fish. Looking at the footnote, Matthew 14:13-21 says there are 5000 people (excluding women and children), 5 loaves and 2 fish. Mark 8:1-10 is on target with Matthew's account in Chapter 15; however, Mark 6:34-43 corroborates John's Gospel. The only difference is that the boy is left out.  Luke 10:2-17 mirrors Matthew 14:13-21 and Mark 8:1-10. Could they be 2 different events? Nowhere is the boy mentioned except in John.

He Gave All He Had

Why could that be? Should we take John's word over the other 3 that the boy provided the bread? He seems pretty accurate with his recount of the miracle; enough to include the boy. He must have thought the boy was important. Maybe the other 3 thought the boy would detract from the event. I never gave the boy another thought until the priest mentioned it during the Homily. It made perfect sense. Here is this boy who has some bread tucked in his pocket. He's just hanging around the apostles, most likely looking up to them and wanting to be like them. (This is probably why the other apostles didn't include him in their recounts: they probably didn't even notice him or thought he was in the way.) He hears them talking about not having anything to give the people to eat & he pipes up, shrugging his shoulders, thinking it insignificant. He offers them the mashed up bread in his pocket. Or, maybe he pulled Andrew to the side and told him he had 5 loaves and 2 fish. Either way, the main point is that he gave all he had.

All. Not a little bit, but everything, which is what God is calling us to do 24/7.  It took the little boy in this Gospel to place a subtle reminder in our heads. God can do all things, even turn 5 loaves into enough for 5000+.  In return, He asks for us to give Him our all.

Resisting the Urge to Take it Back

I come from a long line of worriers on my mother's side. I try so hard to give it all to Him and sometimes it's easier than others. The priest asked this question (not his exact words; I'm paraphrasing): If we're worrying, are we give Him enough? Are we giving Him our all? And if we aren't, what's holding us back? A few weeks ago he said that we say we trust in the Lord and we put things in His hands, but then we take it back. Isn't it so hard to place it in His hands and not be an "Indian-giver"?  Now that I've drawn your attention to it, will you look closer at someone in the passage who is often ignored?

Getting Back on Track With My Prayer Routine

Picture of train tracks with the words "How I got back on track" above it and "with my daily prayer routine" below it.

Ah, summer. I always do so well with being on a schedule...until we go on vacation. Then it goes by the wayside. I always have good intentions of sticking to my routine but then...vacation. And I get lazy. Getting back on track with my prayer routine is a struggle. Anyone else?

Getting Off-Track

My pre-vacation morning routine looked like this: Wake up at 5:30, out the door with the dogs by 5:45 (before the squirrels are awake!), come home, eat breakfast, feed the dogs, take a shower, pray and reflect, daily mass. All of that before 9:00 a.m.! Surprisingly, I haven't been crashing in the afternoon. Well, most afternoons anyway.
Then we went on vacation. The next week I attended a conference. I did pretty well with my prayer routine on vacation...I at least prayed The Divine Office and my daily prayers. The Daily Mass Readings and journaling went by the wayside, but at least I had my talk with God. The next week at the conference, I prayed The Divine Office in the mornings while my roommate was in the shower. So that's something, right?

Except that I feel a distance to God that wasn't there 2 weeks ago. To keep a good relationship with anyone you have to communicate. It would only make sense that to regain a relationship the communication has to be there. I don't doubt that God was certainly trying to communicate with me while I was gone. It takes 2 to communicate and I'll be the first to admit that I didn't give it my best shot. I may have panicked just a bit when I returned home from the conference, realizing that I have 1 full week of summer left before I go back to work. (I know, I know! That's early for teachers to go back! Our students start July 31st!) Y'all, I really need  God to be on my side when I start the new school year!

3 Answers

The answers are quite simple:
1)Discipline yourself to start over. You had discipline in the first place, right? You know you can do it, so just do it!
2) Forgive yourself. It is what it is and there's no sense in beating yourself up about it. Our God is a merciful (and forgiving) God. If He forgives you, why not forgive yourself?
3) Slide back into it if you need to. I was so tired when I first returned home from my conference that I needed to slide back into my routine. It took me a few days but I did it.

Personally, I'm the kind of person who thrives on routine and schedules. Even so, it is kind of nice to get away from that every now and then. Getting totally out of the routine can make the return a little more difficult, but who said life is easy? So it seems that I'm getting back on track with my prayer routine just in time to have to tweak it a bit for the school year. 

In this post, I discussed why I need a daily routine and what happens when I get off track. There's even a quote included from a book that I read from every now and then that really drives things home.

Need more inspiration?

  • Take a peek into Brandon Vogt's prayer life in this post.
  • This article tells you why Daily Prayer is important and explains the how.
  • What, how, why, and where is discussed in this post.


{Book Review} Under the Mantle: Marian Thoughts from a 21st Century Priest

Big orange circle with a quote in the middle of it.
Under the Mantle: Marian Thoughts from a 21st Century Priest by Father Donald Calloway, MIC (Marian Press, 2013) is the perfect book for someone who is not a theologian to read and glean an understanding of Mary. Even if you think you know Mary, this book has some thought-provoking and "aha" moments for you.
Father Donald H. Calloway is a priest who is known as the "Surfer Priest". I read his book No Turning Back: A Witness to Mercy in one day. I was riveted by what a troubled young man he was and his "in your face" conversion. While that book is not necessary before reading Under the Mantle, it does provide a bit of insight as to who exactly wrote this book.
Fr. Calloway poses this question in the 3rd Chapter (Who Do You Say That I Am?":
So what the heck happened that caused so many modern Catholics to turn away from loving Jesus and his Church? The answer is heartbreaking. They had forgotten Mary.
How in the world do any Christians, much less Catholics, forget Mary? Heartbreaking, indeed. I thought I knew a lot about Mary but after reading this book I realize I have so much more to learn. Father Calloway does an excellent job of putting Mary right smack dab in the middle of our faith and explaining how she is a part of every facet of Christianity. How sad is it that she is often cast aside?

Connecting Us with Jesus

In the introduction, Father Calloway suggests reading this book slowly. I'm a fast reader and often don't retain a lot of what I read. I took his suggestion to heart. I would read a chapter then put the book down. That allowed his words to truly sink in.
Case in point: In Chapter 3 Father Calloway gives the illustration of Mary's importance by using our body. We are the body, Jesus is the head, and Mary is the neck. I read that chapter, put the book down, and thought, "Okay. I get it." But, did I really get it? It wasn't until about a week later when I was walking the dogs in the park early one morning that I wholeheartedly understood, thanks to a song by Casting Crowns. I had my earbuds in and my music randomly playing when this song came on:
By the end of the song, I got it. There's no mention of Mary in the song, but Mary (the neck) connects us (the body) to Jesus (the head). If Jesus is the head and we are the body, there has to be something that connects us. There has to be a neck. The neck allows the body to receive nourishment. The neck holds the head. The neck appears to be unimportant, but it isn't. Mary connects us to Jesus.

Seeing Mary in Every Aspect of our Lives

Father Calloway does an excellent job of tying Mary to every aspect of the Catholic Church: Scripture, the Papacy, the Priesthood,  Confession, Matrimony, and The Divine Mercy. Mary's importance in telling of Jesus' birth and childhood is examined. Who told the apostles the stories? As Fr. Calloway says: that's a "no-brainer": it had to be Mary.
At some points in the book, I wondered where he was going with the subject and how it tied into Mary. He did a fantastic job of tying everything back to Mary and our relationship to her. In Chapters 8 and 9 he discusses Manhood and Femininity respectively. I have to admit that the manhood chapter made me a little sad because he discusses how important it is for men to show their sons their devotion to Jesus and Mary, as well as praying. I realized that this was such a huge hole in the lives of my sons, but that's a discussion for another day.

Favorite Quotes

At the end of each chapter, there are Marian quotes that Father collected through the years. Here are a few of my favorites:

  • If God labored six days in preparing a paradise for man, he would spend a longer time preparing a paradise for his Divine Son. As no weeds grew in Eden, so no sin would arise in Mary, the paradise of the incarnation. Most unbecoming it would be for the sinless Lord to come into the world through a woman afflicted with sin. A barn door cannot fittingly serve as an entrance to a castle. Venerable Fulton J. Sheen
  • True devotion to Christ demands true devotion to Mary. Pope St. Pius X
  • While we adore the Child, should we not then venerate his mother, and while we kneel to Jesus, should we not at least clasp the hand of Mary for giving us such a Savior? There is a grave danger that, lest in celebrating a Christmas without the mother, we may soon reach a point where we will celebrate Christmas without the Babe, and these days are upon us now.  Venerable Fulton J. Sheen
  • Satan fears Mary as a frightened dog fears the rod with which he has been beaten. St. John Eudes
  • Even if you have to fight distractions all through your whole Rosary be sure to fight well, arms in hand; that is to say, do not stop saying your Rosary even if it is hard to say and you have absolutely no sensible devotion. It is a terrible battle, I know, but one that is profitable to the faithful soul. St. Louis de Montfort
  • If you invoke the Blessed Virgin when you are tempted, she will come at once to your help, and Satan will leave you. St. John Vianney
  • The heart of a mother is a marvel of mercy. When we fear to go to God, when we are overwhelmed by our unworthiness, we can go toMary, because God has entrusted to her the realm of mercy. Blessed Columba Marmion
  • In our day, Our Lady has been given to us as the best defense against the evils that afflict modern life; Marian devotion is the sure guarantee of her maternal protection and safeguard in the hour of temptation. Pope Benedict XVI
  • If you wish to convert anyone to the fullness of the knowledge of our Lord and of his Mystical Body, then teach him the Rosary. One of two things will happen. Either he will stop saying the Rosary--or he will get the gift of faith. Venerable Fulton J. Sheen
  • Do you want to have an advocate in the Son's presence, too? Turn to Mary. St. Bernard of Clairvaux
  • Never be afraid of loving the Blessed Virgin too much. You can never love her more than Jesus did. St. Maximillian Kolbe

Mary has always held a special place in my heart. I wrote about her as my protector in this post. This book gave me a much deeper look at how she is not just our mother, but our mama.
As Christians, we should all embrace Mary as our mother and look to her for intercession. Under the Mantle: Marian Thoughts from a 21st Century Priest is the perfect book to help all Catholics hold Mary in the high esteem she should be and to embrace her as our mother and intercessor.
Big circle with a quote under the title of the blog post.

A Message of Healing in a Broken World

The words "I will praise you, Lord, for you have rescued me" on a peach background.
Our world is in desperate need of healing. It seems for every good story I hear, there are 2 that take its place letting us know that the evil one is trying his best to take over. The Readings for the Thirteenth Sunday in Ordinary Time give us a message of healing in a broken world.

Step By Step, One by One

In the 2nd Reading (2Corinthians 8:7, 9, 13-15) Paul encourages everyone to evangelize. He is cheering us all on to succeed in spreading The Word. When you stop and think about it, it really is astonishing how the Church started and grew. It began with only 12 people going out and preaching. In his new book The Biggest Lie in the History of Christianity, Matthew Kelly discusses "Spiritual Multiplication". In simple terms, it's a group of people who encourage another group of people to proclaim The Word. That group of people engages with another group of people, and so on. That's how The Word spread in the time of the early Church. It's how rumors get started, true, but it can definitely be used to increase the number of Christians. It took time for Christianity to grow; it didn't happen overnight.  We can rebuild what the evil one is tearing down. One person at a time.

Jesus Gets a Tap on the Shoulder

In the Gospel (Mark 5:21-34) we have 1 story that is embedded in another one. Father said that Mark likes to "sandwich" stories. One story starts, then is interrupted by a seemingly different story, and then the first story finishes. Both are about healing. There is a woman who has faith that by just touching Jesus' cloak she will be healed, and it happens. Jairus has faith that Jesus can touch his little girl and heal her. Jesus is on the way to Jairus' house when he is sidetracked. The woman touches his cloak and he knows that someone was healed by touching him. God tapped him on the shoulder and said, "Uh, son. You may want to acknowledge this one." What desperation the woman had knowing that if she touched Jesus he would, in the Jewish law, be considered unclean. She was willing to risk the wrath that very well could have come. I'm sure she thought that, because the crowd was pressing in on Jesus, he wouldn't know that she had been healed. He would have no idea...if she could just touch him. But he did know (it was the tap on the shoulder, I'm telling ya!) and she told him it was her. (Unlike Eve who blamed it on someone else, she took complete responsibility for it.) If she didn't truly believe before then, I bet she did after the exchange between her & Jesus!

Bothering Jesus

When Jesus arrived at Jairus' house, he brought the little girl back to the living through her father's faith, even though the people told Jarius that she was dead so there was no point in bothering Jesus.  Our deceased are not truly dead but are asleep in Christ. We must continue to pray for them so that through not only their faith but also our own can they have eternal life. We have to keep bothering Jesus so that we will all be reunited.

We are such a broken world and we are getting more broken by the hour. Today's words of healing bring some comfort. We have to pray for the brokenness and like the woman and Jairus, we have to have faith that the Trinity will heal us.